I'm not usually one for fall/winter. I don't like the cold, the cold rain or that it gets dark so early. But this time feels different; this time feels fresh and crisp, which is why I think most people do like fall. It's also bittersweet. I'm really excited for this month, but at the same time I am sad.
Let's start with the "neither here nor there": As if there's not enough breast cancer pink in my life, this month, as always, there will be more. I don't know quite how to explain it, but it just means something to me, and I will always support this cause.
The bitter: Today is the last day for a real long time I will be able to hang out with Mal and Ava. Korbin will be returning early next morning, so my best friend and my baby girl are off to Virginia Beach to "ready the home" and welcome their soldier back. I am so proud of Korbin and how quickly he progresses, but I am sad that it take my family away. It really doesn't help that I'm a big cry baby, but even though I told myself I wouldn't cry last night (knowing I'd see them again today), I couldn't help but shed just one tear (or two...) when Ava with her newly acquired big girl voice turned and said "bye bye Sam". She's not quite two and can't express herself as well as we adults can, but I think she knows something's going on.
There will be skype dates and Glee dates and facebook chats and texts about racism, but it's not quite the same, you know? But I know they'll be back, one way or another.
Continuing with the bitter, the anniversary of Papa Bob's death is not even a week away. It's weird to think it's been only a year, because it seems like it's been so long! He was definitely a bright spot in our family, and even though I didn't know him for too terribly long, he treated me as his own and made me feel like I'd known him forever.
The sweet: Life FEELS like it's calming down, although I should know better... Maybe it's just my bear instincts preparing for winter, but I feel a little more content than usual. At the end of the month, we'll be putting on a Harvest Festival at the church for kids in our neighborhood, and I am super excited, because I feel like this is something good for our church. I feel like this will be one of those projects that really brings the church together.
Perhaps part of it IS just me transitioning from summer to fall. Summer always gets so crazy and GLOW isn't precise(?) and organized. Summer's more of a "if we have time, sure" season. Fall, the kids are back in school, people are getting back to their normal schedules, and so am I. We'll have what feels like our first "real" GLOW in a few months, and there are other little things going on that I'm excited about too.
"[Love] bears all things, hopes all things, believes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.
1 Corinthians 13 : 7-8a